You are the type of person who always goes with function over form and substance over style. Family and friends have no understanding of your inner self, but neither do you. Today, you are likely to spend a great deal of time looking for a downtown retail store trying to buy either a wall poster commemorating the first day of winter or blue cotton balls. Be on the lookout for celebrities who speak directly to you through your television. You should consider shopping at stores or businesses beginning with the letter W, but do not buy any products with a serial number or product code containing the number 229368. Your preferred shopping venue is thrift stores. Your special symbol is the comma (,).

As a Brown Pragmatox, you are down-to-earth and practical. You are hard working and industrious. You are frugal to the point that you might even refrain from making a purchase that you really, really need. Doing so often causes problems down the road. You definitely go with function over form and substance over style.

Paper currency issued and authorized by the U.S. Department of the Treasury that is, in principle, backed up by, and exchangeable for, an equivalent value of silver. Silver certificates were in circulation as a medium of exchange for the U.S. economy during two periods, 1878 to 1923 and 1928 to 1957. A similar form of paper currency is gold certificates.

Complete Entry | Visit the WEB*pedia

Our little excursion through the economy has had, thus far, its ups and downs. My cable bill remains permanently confused and my checking account has a large property-tax created imbalance, but at least the pain in my tooth stops before hitting my toes. I think we deserve a little rest and relaxation at the Shady Valley's own tourist mecca, Happy-Time Gala-World Fun-Land Extravaganza Amusement Park. Let's take a brief respite from our pedestrian trek and give the soles of our jogging shoes a well-deserved rest.

The Happy-Time Gala-World Fun-Land Extravaganza Amusement Park has the world famous Monster Loop Death Plunge roller coaster, guaranteed to make riders yearn for the pleasures of a Siberian forced labor camp. There's also the Enchanted Haunted Horror House filled with serial killers, chainsaw murders, and IRS auditors. For the more timid, and fortunately, for those more interested in the workings of our economy, the merry-go-round is the ride of choice.

Two familiar faces are enjoying the circular trip on their fiberglass ponies. The slender guy with the bushy mustache is Dan Dreiling, the drywall man. I had him repair a hole in my living room wall caused by an over-excited vacuum cleaner a few months back. The disgusted look on his dusty face tells me that I must have overlooked his $100 bill. The other recognizable rider is Pollyanna Pumpernickel a precocious pet store owner who has somehow neglected to pay me the $100 due for hamster-sitting services which I rendered a few weeks ago. Her furtive glances suggest that she is well aware of her liability.
Tell me more...

Visit the PEDestrian's Guide

-- John Stuart Mill

User Feedback