You are the type of person who is often startled by loud noises and quick movements, and easily distracted from whatever you're doing. Family and friends often add sleeping pills, muscle relaxants, and other similar medications to your food and drink in hopeless attempt to reduce your activity level somewhere near normal. Today, you are likely to spend a great deal of time waiting for visits from door-to-door solicitors seeking to buy either a wall poster commemorating the first day of winter or blue cotton balls. Be on the lookout for celebrities who speak directly to you through your television. You should consider shopping at stores or businesses beginning with the letter N, but do not buy any products with a serial number or product code containing the number 021110. Your preferred shopping venue is mail order catalogs. Your special symbol is the question mark (?).

As a Gray Skittery, you are ambivalent, indecisive, and uncertain. You are in a constant struggle between the forces of demand and supply, production and consumption, good and evil... and you're losing the battle. You have trouble making decisions and choosing from among the seemingly infinite number of options that you perpetually face. Your shopping experiences are inevitably confusing.

An agency of the U.S. Federal government responsible for chartering national banks. In other words, anyone wanting to establish a bank with the word "national" in the title must gain permission from the Office of the Comptroller of the Currency (OCC). The Comptroller is also responsible for regulating banks and might even assume control of a bank that is in serious trouble (that is, on the verge of failure). Although the term "currency" appears in the title, the Office of the Comptroller of the Currency is primarily a bank regulator and has almost nothing to do with the nation's "currency." The OCC was established in 1863 as a bureau of the U.S. Department of the Treasury and is located in Washington, D.C.

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This may be the greatest day of my life. The musical group to top all musical groups -- The Strollers -- has just released its latest CD with a song that's certain to be a foot-tapping classical. Of course, you know the song of which I speak -- "Sidewalking." Let's stop into the Musical Sound CD Emporium in the Shady Valley Central Town Sprawling Hills Shopping Mall and fulfill my dreams. Everyone in Shady Valley, however, does not share my joy. As the seventeen year old Emporium clerk, Alicia Hyfield, completes my transaction, she confesses more than a bit of disgruntlement over here just-issued paycheck. A little investigation reveals some displeasure with the size of the FICA deduction. Her disgruntlement isn't lessened to know that this is for the government's social security program that's suppose to provide a source of income in her golden years. She seems more than a bit skeptical of ever seeing any returns. Maybe we can alleviate her concerns (and mine) with a quick run through social security.
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-- William A. Ward

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