You are the type of person who runs the other way when new fashion trends appear on the horizon. Family and friends will not ride in the car when you're driving because you refuse to obey oppressive traffic laws, such as stop signs, speed limits, and traffic lights. Today, you are likely to spend a great deal of time surfing the Internet trying to buy either a computer that can play video games and burn DVDs or a black duffle bag with velcro closures. Be on the lookout for rusty deck screws. You should consider shopping at stores or businesses beginning with the letter L, but do not buy any products with a serial number or product code containing the number 079676. Your preferred shopping venue is flea markets. Your special symbol is the backslash (\).

As an Orange Rebeloon, you are very much the rebel and the contrarian. It is your nature to go against the grain. When everyone else is buying, you sell. When everyone else is selling, you buy. You go against the trends. You disdain fashion. If it's hot, you're not. You would march to your own drummer and dance to your own tune, if doing so wasn't so trite and conventional.

The official unemployment rate, which measures the proportion of the civilian labor force 16 years or older that is not engaged in productive activities but is actively seeking employment, might be either overstated or understated due to discouraged workers, part-time workers, and unreported legal or illegal employment. Taken together, these measurement problems suggest that the official unemployment rate is likely understated during business-cycle contraction and overstated during business-cycle expansions.

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Our little excursion through the economy has had, thus far, its ups and downs. My cable bill remains permanently confused and my checking account has a large property-tax created imbalance, but at least the pain in my tooth stops before hitting my toes. I think we deserve a little rest and relaxation at the Shady Valley's own tourist mecca, Happy-Time Gala-World Fun-Land Extravaganza Amusement Park. Let's take a brief respite from our pedestrian trek and give the soles of our jogging shoes a well-deserved rest.

The Happy-Time Gala-World Fun-Land Extravaganza Amusement Park has the world famous Monster Loop Death Plunge roller coaster, guaranteed to make riders yearn for the pleasures of a Siberian forced labor camp. There's also the Enchanted Haunted Horror House filled with serial killers, chainsaw murders, and IRS auditors. For the more timid, and fortunately, for those more interested in the workings of our economy, the merry-go-round is the ride of choice.

Two familiar faces are enjoying the circular trip on their fiberglass ponies. The slender guy with the bushy mustache is Dan Dreiling, the drywall man. I had him repair a hole in my living room wall caused by an over-excited vacuum cleaner a few months back. The disgusted look on his dusty face tells me that I must have overlooked his $100 bill. The other recognizable rider is Pollyanna Pumpernickel a precocious pet store owner who has somehow neglected to pay me the $100 due for hamster-sitting services which I rendered a few weeks ago. Her furtive glances suggest that she is well aware of her liability.
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