You are the type of person who is on a first name basis with every store clerk in a sixty mile radius. Family and friends seek you out when they have any old clothing, broken toys, or defective small kitchen appliances they want to sell. Today, you are likely to spend a great deal of time flipping through the yellow pages looking to buy either a coffee cup commemorating the first day of winter or a video game player. Be on the lookout for the last item on a shelf. You should consider shopping at stores or businesses beginning with the letter A, but do not buy any products with a serial number or product code containing the number 571746. Your preferred shopping venue is shopping malls. Your special symbol is the asterisk (*).

As a Yellow Chipperoon, you are happy, happy, happy. You enjoy everything about life and about shopping. You love shopping. You love buying. You love spending. You love to compare products and prices. You love the crowds. You love chatting with the store clerks. You love every bit of the buying process. Nothing dissuades you from having a good time shopping, whether you're buying a box of facial tissues or a new house. Does it get any better than spending an afternoon at the shopping mall? No way!

Alternative perspectives of the proper role that government should play in the economy, with conservatives on the right, liberals on the left, and moderates in the middle. Libertarians show up to the right of conservatives and socialists (including Marxists and communists) are to the left of liberals.

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It was THE most exciting baseball game in the long rivalry between the Shady Valley Primadonnas and the Oak Town Sludge Puppies. Two out, two on, the bottom of the ninth, the home team down by a run, and Harold "Hair Doo" Dueterman -- the Primadonnas' star center fielder -- up to bat. What excitement. What drama. Unfortunately Hair Doo hit the ball directly at the Primadonnas' runner on first. A line shot to the head. The runner was out. He was also unconscious. Game over. That was not the end to the excitement, though. Chucky Calhoun, the peanut vendor, was inadvertently decked by an enthusiastic fan and suffered a number of injuries as he tumbled down some concrete steps. Chucky, who has made repeated complaints to the Primadonnas owner (D. J. Goodluck) about unsafe working conditions, has filed a workers' compensation claim. What a mess. Too bad Hair Doo just didn't strike out like he usually does.
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